After a nearly nine-month long break that in no way whatsoever coincided with college acceptances, the staff of the Dungeon, Princeton High School’s leading news outlet, was roused late this August by what some are calling “the tweet heard ‘round the world.”
“PHS… student schedules viewable via your portal access!” read the innocuous tweet that was soon to become one of noted rabble-rouser Gary Snyder’s most controversial.
“When I saw that schedules had been released, I couldn’t believe it,” said rising senior Taylor Lorin, in a sentiment shared by many in the PHS community. “Seeing that my schedule for this school year was available was the most exciting news that I’d gotten since last year’s schedule came out.”
But these eager students were in for a surprise when they attempted to view their schedules via the very portal accesses that Principal Snyder had directed them to. “I won’t lie to you, when I couldn’t log in to my PowerSchool account, much less see my schedule, I broke down,” said Ben Fulton, a rising junior. Similar reports of sobbing, screaming, and hysterical cries of “Why? Why?” by PHS students soon began flooding in from all corners of the Princeton and Cranbury residential areas.
Students weren’t the only ones affected by this catastrophe either. “I was trying to log into my PowerTeacher account until 2 a.m.,” said teacher Lindsey Terence, who was reportedly hoping against hope that held-back freshman Jason Neal would not be in any of her classes. “I just needed to know who I had in my classes. I didn’t learn that staff schedules aren’t even available yet until someone posted in our Facebook group ‘PHS TEACHERS 2015-2016’.”
Snyder’s following tweet, “Joke’s on you!” has since been deleted. The PHS administration has yet to comment on the fiasco.
The Dungeon staff, on holiday in Waikiki, received the news slower than student Facebook feeds but faster than the Tower, which has yet to report on what many are calling the first major story of the school year.