Clubs

Freshman Officers Already Making Life Changing School Alterations

Student CouncilLess than a week after being elected to the famously hard-working Student Council, new freshman officers have already released a plan of action that will change PHS forever. Among other initiatives, representatives have proposed reforming the letter day system, which they criticized as “too confusing,” rewriting the English I curriculum, which is reportedly “too boring,” and revising the Biology I Accelerated curriculum, which they say is “too hard.”

As soon as they were elected, the young scholars knew they had become something great. “Once I heard my name on the loudspeaker, I knew I had to step up my game in order to live up to the great expectations of representatives on Student Government,” said freshman Treasurer Richard Frank. “I immediately started on a four-year action proposal akin to those created by every group of class officers.”

When asked about current initiatives, senior Secretary Barry Powell said, “As a group, we do a lot of things for the PHS community. Ever hear of Mr. PHS? Well, StuCo puts it on.” Powell went on to list a plethora of other sponsored activities, such as Mr. PHS, Mr. PHS, and “that thing that happens in February where the senior guys dress up and perform.”

Students universally praise the constant actions Student Government takes to improve the community. “I filled out a Google Form the other week,” said one senior. “It was the funnest thing ever!” A Dungeon contributor later reported a sighting of this same student accepting what appeared to be free Mr. PHS tickets from a current officer in the corner of the IDEAS Center.

“I’m looking forward to a great year,” said freshman President Ashley Ryan. “Our hardworking StuCo is ready to make this year, along with this year’s Mr. PHS male pageant, a great one for everyone!”

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